Wednesday, April 16, 2014

It is so inconvenient

... growing old.  I recently spent at least 30 seconds attempting to remove a stray hair from my face then I realized it was a wrinkle, and I do use a magnifying mirror. It reminded me of something my mother used to say, 'failing eyesight is a compensation for old age', she could no longer see the stray hairs, nor most of the wrinkles and worked on the premise 'what you can't see won't hurt you'. I think I need to have my eyes tested again.

There are so many products and procedures out there claiming to reduce or eliminate wrinkles, but physically picking them off your face is not one of them, it doesn't work and neither do any of the more expensive so called solutions. The solution is to accept the inevitable and sit back and enjoy the ride. Of course, one would hope that you have been doing that all along.

According to wiki :
"A wrinkle, also known as a rhytide, is a fold, ridge or crease in the skin. Skin wrinkles typically appear as a result of aging processes such as glycation, habitual sleeping positions, loss of body mass, or temporarily, as the result of prolonged immersion in water. Age wrinkling in the skin is promoted by habitual facial expressions, aging, sun damage, smoking, poor hydration, and various other factors."
If, like me, you have no clue what glycation means, here is a wiki you may, or may not, find helpful. I had to reread it a few times before it started to make sense to me.

I found an article from the Daily Mail online and, despite being now considered by most definitions, and most people, to be elderly, I still found it hilariously funny.  I tend to think in pictures and the picture this article conjured up made me wish that I were a cartoonist, but I managed to find the cartoon above that works, and I assure you, it is free to use on personal blogs, so no copyright infringement. You will notice the large noses, ears and feet in the cartoon.

The article lists many of the changes old age can cause - here are the headings, go to the article here if you want to see how they expand on each affliction:
  • The pitch of your voice changes - men's voices get higher, women's drop
  • Your ears, nose and feet get bigger
  • Soap will give you skin allergies 
  • You'll clear your throat more often
  • Teeth look longer
  • Weight gain
  • Sneezing more
  • Extra moles
  • Waking up with a headache
  • Getting tipsy more quickly
  • Visible neck pulse in women
  • Watery eyes
  • Being disturbed in the night
But it's not all bad news: (though I do think that Getting tipsy more quickly could be seen as a pro rather than a con.)
  • Migraines become less painful with time
They didn't mention:
  • Wrinkles
  • Thinning bones
  • Memory loss
  • Aching joints
  • Facial hair growth in women
  • Hair loss in men (and some less fortunate women)
And I am sure there are many more. Thankfully I have not yet experience too many of these side effects of old age, no doubt I will in time. Here are some of my more favourite quotes on the subject of life, old age and death.

The amazing Betty White on old age:
“It’s not a surprise, we knew it was coming – make the most of it. So you may not be as fast on your feet, and the image in your mirror may be a little disappointing, but if you are still functioning and not in pain, gratitude should be the name of the game.”  ― Betty White, If You Ask Me
Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez Colombian-born author and winner of the 1982 Nobel Prize for Literature:
“The truth is I'm getting old, I said. We already are old, she said with a sigh. What happens is that you don't feel it on the inside, but from the outside everybody can see it.”  ― Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez, Memories of My Melancholy Whores
A favorite author of mine from way back, Sir Terence David John "Terry" Pratchett, OBE:
“It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.”  Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent
And I save the best to last, Mark Twain:
“I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”  Mark Twain
"The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time." ― Mark Twain
So, if you haven't already done so - start living fully and enjoy the ride.